Getting a Good Caption With A Difficult Illustration

Might have a bit of luck with this one.  I think the illustration is such a challenge that most people won't come up with anything.  I sure wasn't, until this one popped into my head.

Update:  I take it back.  There were two really good submissions in the finalists announced this week.  I would have been really proud of either of these.

"I look like five bucks."

or

"Oh my God, it's finally happened.  I've turned into my forefather."